Hair Force One

Meat Ball here. I’ve been downtown all night picking up incredibly high priced pussy at some of the hot dance clubs we got around here. Spock and MB have been bouncing from club to club dropping hundred dollar bills down in front of any babes who’ll let us get a little bit of action. Spock’s only after a facejob or two from these cuties. He’s that kind of guy, he likes the deep throat and that’s all well and good, but when Meat Ball gets down, he gets down with the pussy!

Get this, though. These hot downtown nightclubs? All the girls that party in those clubs shave their beaves! I get ‘em into the bathroom with me, pay ‘em a few hundred and pull their panties down, and I’m like “What the fuck is this shit? Where’s the beave?”

I don’t actually yell that out loud, just think it while I’m boning the hairless babe (you didn’t think I’d not fuck it). It’s not bad. It’s fun to whack your wang into a silky and slippery smooth slit, but come on...maybe it’s cause Meat Ball usually fucks European chicks (Spock and MB are heading to the Hague in 6 weeks – be there!), but if there ain’t a little bit of fur on the field, it’s just not a complete pussy.

Eventually Spock and Meat Ball decide that these clubs are bullshit. Also, I’m all out of dough. I blew nearly eight hundred bucks on tonight's prostitutes, and didn’t even get a pube caught in my teeth. Feast on that act of violence! What-the-fuck-ever, right? Spock and I go back to the Meat Pad to do some meth. After we’re high as kites, Spock heads into the other room to play Galaga or steal some of my meth or something, and I decide that it’s time for Meat Ball to whack off!

For a while now, the trend in the fuck-flick biz seems to lean towards hairless honeys, but every now and then some awesome flicks pops through and I go to whack-job heaven. And I’m not talking about those nasty fetish movies that are full of ugly chicks with beards and hairy knees and shit. I’m talking about a totally hot, A-list fuck-movie with plenty of bushy pubic hair! This Hair Force One from 3rd Degree is sent straight from cooze heaven! My personal favorite from this fine film is the scene between Helena Bush and Franco Roccaforte. She’s perky, skinny, sexy and she’s got a bush to die for. I nearly blew my load with envy when I saw Franco ramming his thick black monster into that furry little box. That chick fucks like a wildcat, and she had me jizzing with enthusiasm after about ten minutes. There’s really only one small drawback with this otherwise fantastic scene: she never gets fucked in the ass. I’m sitting there watching that hairy beave get plowed in ever position, and I’m thinking, “Okay, Franco. Now fuck her fur-framed asshole!”, but damn it…it never happens! That’s okay, though. The rest of the movie is loaded with ass-sex (plus a couple awesome DPs), so I got my rectal fix elsewhere.

So, to sum it up, this movie fucking rocks. Here’s what you really need to know :

• Bushy beavers attached to gorgeous babes, not the usual ug-mo’s that you find in hair films. This is a high-end hair film! Finally!
• Lots of anal and DP action.
• This shit’s 100% interracial. Not a white cock in sight!
• Brown and blonde bush! Oh, man, do I love a strawberry blonde pussy!

That ought to give you a pretty good idea what you’re in for with this one.

Anyway, Meat Ball’s outta here. Later on tonight, I’m gonna be prowlin’ the streets, looking for some more beave to sink my face into. My pal Spock just got some really good weed, so we’re gonna get fuckin’ high and then head on down by the waterfront (everybody knows that’s where the bushy prostitutes are at). Until next time, fuckaz! MEEEEEEEEEAAAAAT BALLLL!