Using porn to get into a ladies undies

Wicked Pictures is really good at what they call "Couples Porn". You know, the kind of filth you can watch with your fuckin' wife and then trick her in to takin' one in the cornhole. Now, Spock Buckton don't really do "couples"... unless your talkin' about whackin' back a couple o' brews... but something told me this kinda shit might be useful to me someday.

This one's all about one of my heroes, a kick-ass dude named Randy Spears. I'm sure his character has a different name than Randy Spears in the actual movie but I could give a fuck about that. The point is, Randy Spears is a married dude but he doesn't let that control what his cock fucks. This one starts off with him slipping the high, hard one to jessica drake (his mistress) while she's bathing. Right off the bat, Spears is letting her know - scrub all you want, baby, but you'll never be able to wash this dick off of you. After that he goes home to his boring wife, Julia Ann. Rather than giving her cooze what for, he decides to just have a dream about how awesome it used to be when he could fuck her like a cool guy. Now she's all puffy and used-up and who needs that?! In the morning, some other stuff happens so the Spearsinator goes for a run to clear his head, but ends up having a heart attack! Whoa, Spearsy! We got 3 words for you - TOO MUCH FUCKIN'!

The rest of the movie kinda sucks dick because Randy Spears is in a coma and there's a bunch of talk about feelings and shit, but that's kind of besides the point. The main point here, is this is the kind of movie that you watch with a chick in order to make her spread her beave for you.

PERIOD.

I tried it the other night, with sexy results. There's this chick who's butthole I've been tryin' to spread for eons but I could never get her to come back to my lair. The other night I called her up and told her that I got a bootleg copy of that shitty License to Wed movie and she should get her ass over to club Spock before I decide to use it as a meth tray. The next thing I know, she's on my couch and I pop in Love Always.

"Let's warm up with this one," I say. "It's a woman movie."

Her panties are gettin' wet, Spock can smell it.

"Yeah, whatever," she replied. "I don't have to work tomorrow."

"I do," I think to myself. "I gotta work on getting your pussy stains off my sheets."

I could tell you how the rest of the night went, but Spock Buckton don't fuck and tell. Just let it be known that one of us had about 3 orgasms and his name was Spock.

Oh, and Meat Ball was in the closet the whole fuckin' time!

SPOCK, OUT!

Don't try to titty fuck your buddy's fat sister!

Hey fuck-o's! Spock Buckton here!

The one thing I've always loved about studios like 3rd Degree is they go the 100% gonzo route. No cheesy set-ups or plots. No saying "Hey girl, I like you" or "Yo lady, let's get carnal!" They cut right to the fuckin' chase, just like Spock does... or tries to at least. But, with Breast Seller 2 - like Breast Seller 1 before it -does is cut to the fuckin' chase even quicker! We're talking 34 scenes of big tit action and each scene starts either mid-fuck or mid-suck! I don't know about you, but that's the way I like it. I don't need no wussy strip tease or cock tease. I'll give you a fuck you tease! Let's get to the fuckin' action here! My favorite thing to do with this flick is get my cock real good and lubed up with butter (I ain't springin' for no fancy lube!) and then skip randomly from scene to scene never knowing what chest bananas might be bouncing in my face next. I guarantee maximum cum-splooging using this technique but you might want to do yourself a favor and savor the scene with Gianna and some other chick who I didn't really like looking at from behind but her cock-slinging skills were A+.

The best part about Breast Seller 2 was that it just made me really want to get in on some real-life titty fucking. The problem is, the hooker Spock's been keeping around the building is as flat-chested as Laura Dern and will only let me poke her in the ass. What's her beef? And why's her clit feel so fat? Anyway.... I called up my boy Meat Ball cuz I know his sister is hung like lady cow but with less tits. She just gots to be down for some zoob slammin'!

"Yo, Meat Ball. WAZZUP? Yo, can I come over and titty fuck your sister?"

Meat responds, "Okay, but like Meat Ball always says: wipe up your own jizz, fuckaz -'cause Meat Ball's comin' in after ya!"

I could tell you what happened with the rest of the night, but we're not allowed to talk about it until the trial.

Spock out, buttfucks!